SCORE ALERT: ROD blowing out ICE in Football 49-0

[proxio]

THURSDAY MAY 3, 2012

at Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum in Los Angeles, California

DISTRIBUTOR(S): Paramount Television, EA Sports, ICE's Wide World of Sports, TCC Sports
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER: Steve Walters
GAME TIME: 6:10 p.m. EST/3:10 p.m. PST
GAME WEATHER: 66 °F (19 °C), sunny
GAME ATTENDANCE: 94,184
HEAD REFEREE: Gary Senise (Senior Lieutenant)
TV HOSTS (TCC): Joey Lawrence, Robin Thicke
TV ANNOUNCERS (TCC): Eddie Money (play-by-play), Charles Barkley (color analyst)
EXTRA COMMENTATORS (TCC): Jenn Sterger, Sara Carbonero, Jerry Rice, Vince Vaughn
SIDELINE REPORTERS (TCC): Shelley Hennig, Jessica Parker Kennedy, Elisabetta Canalis, Jill Guill
STUDIO CREW (TCC): Michael Steger, Michael B. Jordan, Jessica Parker Kennedy, Mike Ditka, Howie Long



THE MAIN EVENT

FOOTBALL




Team SBC Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Drew Brees
2. Running Back: Tim Tebow
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback: Frankie Muniz
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Scotty McCreery
5. Center (Protection): Anabella Casanova
6. Right Guard (Protection): Michael Vick
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Terrell Owens (aka; T.O.)
8. Main Wide Receiver: Tammi Brooks
9. Wide Receiver: Taylor Ball
10. Wide Receiver: Penny McCool
11. Wide Receiver: Mario Idol
12. Wide Receiver: Kaitlyn Dever

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Cole Sprouse
2. Defensive Lineman: Jessica Rose
3. Defensive Lineman: Anthony Anderson
4. Left Outside Linebacker: David Henrie
5. Middle Linebacker: Jethro Grantham
6. Middle Linebacker: Bernard Hamlin
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Jennette McCurdy
8. Left Cornerback: Jake T. Austin
9. Right Cornerback: Dylan Sprouse
10. Free Safety: Brett Fox
11. Strong Safety (big hitter): Mario Idol
12. Extra Corner: David Gallagher


Team DV Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Eli Manning
2. Running Back: Max Dreamer
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback:
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Deborah Jo Wood
5. Center (Protection): Jennifer Lawrence
6. Right Guard (Protection): Dylan O'Brain
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Chris Evans
8. Main Wide Receiver: Max Dreamer
9. Wide Receiver: Elsa Pawlowski
10. Wide Receiver: Josh Hutcherson
11. Wide Receiver: Rain Pawlowski
12. Wide Receiver: Hot Stuff (TLGOV)

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Tammin Sursok
2. Defensive Lineman: 2 Faced
3. Defensive Lineman: Samaire Armstrong
4. Left Outside Linebacker: Andrew Garfield
5. Middle Linebacker: Harriet Standford
6. Middle Linebacker: Joe Dinicol
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Jonathan Patrick Moore
8. Left Cornerback: Jess (TLGOV)
9. Right Cornerback: Ashley Benson
10. Free Safety: Avan Jogia
11. Strong Safety: K-9 (big hitter)
12. Extra Corner: Anna Kournikova








Team EBC Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback - Adam Gilchrist
2. Running Back - Mark Foster
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback - Donald Glover
4. Left Tackle (Protection) - Danny Pudi
5. Center (Protection) - Ken Jeong
6. Right Guard (Protection) - Alison Brie
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver) - Aaron Paul
8. Main Wide Receiver - Bryan Cranston
9. Wide Receiver - Chris O'Dowd
10. Wide Receiver - Silas Weir Mitchell
11. Wide Receiver - Richard Ayoade
12. Wide Receiver - Tim Cahill

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman - James Mercer
2. Defensive Lineman - Chevy Chase
3. Defensive Lineman - Alyson Hannigan
4. Left Outside Linebacker - Jim Rash
5. Middle Linebacker - John Krasinski
6. Middle Linebacker - Rainn Wilson
7. Right Outside Linebacker - John C. McGinley
8. Left Cornerback - Josh Radnor
9. Right Cornerback - David Giuntoli
10. Free Safety - David Tennant
11. Strong Safety (big hitter) - Jon Bernthal
12. Extra Corner - Jason Segal


Team UNO Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Lance Armstrong
2. Running Back: Alex Rodriguez
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback: Jack Davenport
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Josh Holloway
5. Center (Protection): Joel McHale
6. Right Guard (Protection): Anna Friel
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Joshua Jackson
8. Main Wide Receiver: Zachary Levi
9. Wide Receiver: Peter Sarsgaard
10. Wide Receiver: Jimmy Bennett
11. Wide Receiver: Henry Ian Cusick
12. Wide Receiver:Christopher Shyer

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Kit Harington
2. Defensive Lineman: Chelsea Handler
3. Defensive Lineman:John Krasinski
4. Left Outside Linebacker: Brian Gross
5. Middle Linebacker: Dan Castellaneta
6. Middle Linebacker: Harry Shearer
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Katey Sagal
8. Left Cornerback: Chord Overstreet
9. Right Cornerback: Jimmy Fallon
10. Free Safety: Regis Philbin
11. Strong Safety (big hitter): Steve Jones
12. Extra Corner: Sonya Walger








Team TCC Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback - Channing Tatum
2. Running Back - Joseph Morgan
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback
4. Left Tackle (Protection) - Dwayne Johnson
5. Center (Protection) - Viggo Mortensen
6. Right Guard (Protection) - Danny DeVito
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver) - Lochlyn Munro
8. Main Wide Receiver - Adrian Lester
9. Wide Receiver - Rob Schneider
10. Wide Receiver - Brad Pitt
11. Wide Receiver - Andrew Lincoln
12. Wide Receiver - Monica Potter

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman - Richard Kiel
2. Defensive Lineman - Brendan Fraser
3. Defensive Lineman - Max Thieriot
4. Left Outside Linebacker - Brandon Keener
5. Middle Linebacker - Charlie Day
6. Middle Linebacker - Cayleen Davies
7. Right Outside Linebacker - Michael Pitt
8. Left Cornerback - Jason Acuña
9. Right Cornerback - Jude Law
10. Free Safety - Liam Neeson
11. Strong Safety (big hitter) - Kevin Smith
12. Extra Corner - Sean Lennon


Team MRA Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Seth Myers
2. Running Back: Laura Prepon
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback: Blair Underwood
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Raven Symone
5. Center (Protection): Kenan Thompson
6. Right Guard (Protection): Hugh Laurie
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Seth MacFarlane
8. Main Wide Receiver: Hayden Panettiere
9. Wide Receiver: Whitney Cummings
10. Wide Receiver: Lauren Lapkus
11. Wide Receiver: Noah Gray-Cabey
12. Wide Receiver: Katherine McPhee

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Blair Underwood
2. Defensive Lineman: Kenan Thompson
3. Defensive Lineman: Raven Symone
4. Left Outside Linebacker: Sandra Oh
5. Middle Linebacker: Katherine McPhee
6. Middle Linebacker: Hugh Laurie
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Seth MacFarlene
8. Left Cornerback: Hayden Panettiere
9. Right Cornerback: Whitney Cummings
10. Free Safety: Noah Gray-Cabey
11. Strong Safety (big hitter): Aubrey Plaza
12. Extra Corner: Lauren Lapkus








ICE vs. ROD

Team ICE Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Santana Shields
2. Running Back: Jeffrey Walker
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback: Kobe Granger
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Mehcad Brooks
5. Center (Protection): Kenny Roy
6. Right Guard (Protection): Ahmad Lewis
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Mac Byrd, Jr.
8. Main Wide Receiver: Allison Shields
9. Wide Receiver: Kya Summers
10. Wide Receiver: Angel McNichol
11. Wide Receiver: Barbara Palvin
12. Wide Receiver: Frankie Beckham

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Richard Dillon
2. Defensive Lineman: Kobe Granger
3. Defensive Lineman: Todd "Action" Jackson
4. Left Outside Linebacker: Tyson Carter
5. Middle Linebacker: Frankie Beckham
6. Middle Linebacker: AnnaLynne McCord
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Emily Didonato
8. Left Cornerback: Tracy Kimmell
9. Right Cornerback: Allison Shields
10. Free Safety: Tiffany Giardina
11. Strong Safety (big hitter): Kya Summers
12. Extra Corner: Barbara Palvin


Team ROD Members
OFFENSE
1. Quarterback: Timothy Gosling
2. Running Back: Clarissa Artest
3. Secondary Running Back or Fullback: Brian Williams
4. Left Tackle (Protection): Vin Diesel
5. Center (Protection): Brock Lesnar
6. Right Guard (Protection): Steve Burton
7. Tight End (Extra Protection or Receiver): Marcel Gotch
8. Main Wide Receiver: Aisha Williams
9. Wide Receiver: Priscilla Martin
10. Wide Receiver: Kim Kreuk
11. Wide Receiver: Romeo Miller
12. Wide Receiver: Nicole Gale Anderson

DEFENSE
1. Defensive Lineman: Jay Ecko
2. Defensive Lineman: Brock Lesnar
3. Defensive Lineman: Cam Gigadnet
4. Left Outside Linebacker: Tyson Beckford
5. Middle Linebacker: Shia LaBeouf (C)
6. Middle Linebacker: Lenny Marks
7. Right Outside Linebacker: Luke Grimes
8. Left Cornerback: Aisha Williams
9. Right Cornerback: Kim Kreuk
10. Free Safety: Casey Jon Deidrick
11. Strong Safety (big hitter): Jesse Metcalfe
12. Extra Corner: Jenny Sense

Backup Quarterbacks: Mark Sanchez, Darin Brooks, Sasha Grey






Michael Steger (Studio Host): WOW! This is just an absolute shocker right here as ICE is getting their ass beat in this football game by their nemesis ROD right now here at halftime. Shia LaBeouf and Jenny Sense are playing out of their mind right now and Timothy Gosling doing a great job in his debut at quarterback for them.

Michael Steger (Studio Host): Howie explain to us what ICE can do to even attempt to get back in this ball game.

Howie Long (Studio Analyst): Look this team is getting their ass whooped but there's still a whole half left to play as this becomes the dangerous side of the game where its hard to protect leads and we'll see how Scott Baio prepares his team coming out of that locker room to protect this lead b/c ICE has a lot of talent and can explain at any moment and go on a route. What we should not forget right now is how young this ICE team is led by a very young head coach in Jessica Lowndes and a young coaching staff compared to the two veteran teams they had go to the title games. Santana Shields came into this game too excited and she's thrown 6 interceptions she's got to get her head back in the game and the MVP Allison Shields needs to step up more and take this game over. ICE is just getting bullied out there by the team and the fans hopefully they step up their going to be the laughing stock until the next BOTNS. If you're ROD you better not give up this lead or you will never hear the end of it.

Michael Steger (Studio Analyst): Well lets hope we can get some kind of drama b/c this is embarrassing for Team ICE. We'll return to the field after these messages and a word from our main sponsor.

[rodshooter]

Scott Baio (President): HOLY SHIT! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[BlueLick]

Jessica Lowndes' speech to her team at half-time:


Jessica Lowndes: I don't know what to say really we got our asses beat out there plain and simple.

Jessica Lowndes: You guys played like FUCKING PUSSIES OUT THERE!

Jessica Lowndes: You guys played scared and it irritated the shit out of me out there.

Jessica Lowndes: I'm a half away from getting my ass fired after this game.

Jessica Lowndes: None of what we did earlier today in our wins count, its all about what we do in this football game.

Jessica Lowndes: I want to beat the shit out of those losers especially Scott Baio's old ass.

Jessica Lowndes: Everybody in this room has got to feel this way, nobody can be satisfied what happened in that fucking 1st half.

Jessica Lowndes: THE 1ST HALF IS DONE! THE SECOND 2ND HALF IS OURS! ALRIGHT!

Jessica Lowndes: I WANT TO STICK IT IN THEIR ASSES AND BEAT THEIR ASSES OUT THERE.

Jessica Lowndes: THEY THINK YOU'RE THE SAME TEAM AS THAT 1ST HALF WHEN YOU WERE A BUNCH OF SCARED BOYS & GIRLS. THEY DON'T KNOW!

Jessica Lowndes: We can fight our way back and out of hell.

Jessica Lowndes: We got 30 more damn minutes to turn this shit the fuck around.

Jessica Lowndes: LOOK AT ME GODDAMN'T!

Jessica Lowndes: LOOK INTO MY COLD GREEN EYES!

Jessica Lowndes: This our damn house now and were not leaving until we won this goddamn game.

Jessica Lowndes: I look around and I see all of these young faces and being apart of the Phederation isn't easy.

Jessica Lowndes: Can you feel that goddamn thing beating in your goddamn chest right now?

Jessica Lowndes: That's your fucking heart and your heart is still beating goddamn't it.

Jessica Lowndes: Until it stops beating you don't fucking quit for no damn reason.

Jessica Lowndes: I want to see....

Jessica Lowndes: I want to see....

Jessica Lowndes: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I WANT TO SEE THAT GRASS GO FROM GREEN TO RED.

Jessica Lowndes: I want to see ROD's blood damn't!

Jessica Lowndes: WHAT TIME IS IT?

Team ICE: TIME TO KILL ROD!

Jessica Lowndes: WHAT TIME IS IT?

Team ICE: TIME TO KILL ROD!

Jessica Lowndes: WHAT TIME IS IT?

Team ICE: TIME TO KILL ROD!

Jessica Lowndes: WHAT TIME IS IT?

Team ICE: TIME TO KILL ROD!

Jessica Lowndes: WHAT TIME IS IT?

Team ICE: TIME TO KILL ROD!

Allison Shields: COACH LOWNDES WE LOVE YOU!

Team ICE: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!

Jessica Lowndes: Hey guys to be honest I am so proud of you guys right now.

Jessica Lowndes: Hey guys to be honest I am so proud....

Jessica Lowndes: I am so proud......

Team ICE: COACH LOWNDES! COACH LOWNDES!

Jessica Lowndes: LISTEN TO ME! LISTEN TO ME! LISTEN TO ME!

Jessica Lowndes: I AM SO PROUD TO BE YOUR HEAD COACH!!!!!!!!!

Team ICE: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jessica Lowndes: Now lets go win a game and kill those old dirty ass strippers!

Team ICE: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tristan Wilds: Let's lock arms ya'll and look like a football unit right now and show the world that the 2nd half is ours.

Tristan Wilds: They throw 49 points at us we'll throw 49 back at them but we'll score more than that. Alright!

Tristan Wilds: Let's go fight out their for the ICE Phederation and send this LA crowd unhappy!

Tristan Wilds: LETS UNITE!

Team ICE: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[BlueLick]

Penn Badgley: We believe in Jessica as she is a really smart coach and we'll figure out a way to get it done.

Tristan Wilds: ROD doesn't know what's in store for them in this 2nd half.

Alexandra Chando: Our team is prepared to make a comeback that will shock the world.

Nina Dobrev: Being down 49-0 for a team with this much talent is dangerous for the team trying to protect a lead.

[rodshooter]

Scott Baio (President): BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH!

Aisha Williams: You guys are getting your asses kicked the worst out of any team today so just shut the fuck up because your lame ass team is not coming back on us. We won't allow a choke job like that to take place.

[BlueLick]

Jessica Lowndes: I can't wait to prove you wrong Scott.

Allison Shields: Laugh now you bastards especially you Aisha Williams but this 2nd half is ours and we'll embarrass you guys in the worst way by making a full comeback on you bastards.